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Those feelings can turn you into "the needy girlfriend." You know, the type. " every time you're apart (What if he sees a prettier girl while he's at the bar with his friends? Whether that's true or not is certainly up for debate. Call when you say you'll call, make her believe you're a loyal boyfriend with a sense of follow-through.
I tend to constantly overlook men’s flaws (to a fault,) so that’s where I didn’t fit in. I love your wife’s blog from when she was your girlfriend. ) Dear Kelly, Thanks for your kind words about me and my wife, and for your honesty and vulnerability. But ultimately, if you’re going to succeed in a corporate environment, you probably know that you should: 1) Befriend important people – above you, below you, on your same level 2) Never say anything negative – it all comes back to haunt you 3) Give credit to others – instead of trying to take credit yourself 4) Consider others’ points of view – just because it’s not your point of view doesn’t mean it’s not valid.
BUT, I could relate to the clinginess in relationships. I constantly go back to it on your website, and I’m glad you included it in your book. Obviously, the message in “Why He Disappeared” can’t apply in equal measure to every unique woman who’s read it, but I’m glad you saw enough universal truth that fits your situation. I was hired to create a magazine for JDate back in 2005. Finally, I was coming in 1 day a week to work on JMag. I may be able to get hired based on my resume, intelligence and work ethic, but if I were really to ascend in a corporate environment, I’d have to do a LOT better at those tasks. You don’t succeed because you’re cute, smart, successful, and fun.
I tend to be the confident, self-assured woman in the dating process, but once I begin the courtship/relationship phase, I become unconfident and clingy. It was called JMag and it was to be patterned after Match.com’s Happen Magazine, where I was a contributor. I had no paid writers, no dedicated graphic designers. I complained to anyone who would listen that JMag was underfunded and underappreciated. Less talented people who knew those things are already at the top of the totem pole. You succeed because you make a good choice in a partner AND because you know how to deal in relating to that partner. Getting the RIGHT guy and making the RIGHT decisions is what determines whether you have a future.
If you weren't, then he wouldn't have started dating you in the first place. Catch her eye from across the room you're out together at a party, let her know that you know you have the best date in the room.
Let her know that you notice her appearance, give her suprise compliments, make it clear you appreciate her.
I just finished reading “Why He Disappeared.” It was extremely insightful. I was immature and headstrong, where it would have been wiser to be patient, positive, and enthusiastic.I didn’t really fit EXACTLY into the female examples you gave but still got a lot out of the material. In the end, I burned most of my bridges at JDate – not because I was untalented – not because they’re a bad company – but because I failed to enroll my colleagues in the vision of greatness I had in my head. The reason I’m sharing that off-track story with you is because, for a couple of years, I blamed JDate for my failures, just as I blamed other “bosses” for our failure to cooperate.You had friends, hobbies, and lots of things that were not centered around him. Having a weekly date night, a monthly day trip, or regular evening text session on both your schedules can give you the sense that things are less amorphous and provide both of you with something to look forward to. Make sure you're still keeping up with those things. Doing so will make you happier, more interesting to him, and less likely to fixate entirely on your relationship. Remind yourself from time-to-time of just how amazing you are. If the reason you're acting clingy is because he's treating you like you don't matter, then it's time for a talk. Give her a call or drop her a text when you're out with your friends to let her know that she's on your mind even when you're apart.